Greek Wedding Traditions and Customs in America

GREEK WEDDING TRADITIONS AND CUSTOMS IN AMERICA

Getting Married in the Greek Orthodox Church

Are you getting married to a Greek? If you are, and you aren’t an Orthodox Christian, you may find that the traditions and protocols are somewhat different than what you are used to. Greek American, weddings over time have adopted many of the social characteristics of their mainstream American counterparts. But one thing that is clear, the wedding ceremony itself has remained completely and distinctively Greek Orthodox. Like many other features of the Church, it has remained virtually unchanged for centuries. Although endless planning goes into ensuring that the wedding and reception are perfect down to the smallest detail, a great deal of attention and consideration should also be given to the ceremony as well.

In the United States, most of the social customs surrounding the wedding festivities are American, with a few Greek customs here and there. However, the wedding ceremony itself remains pristinely Greek Orthodox, unchanged for centuries. It incorporates human joy with the joy of heaven when two people are united in holy matrimony. The service is conducted around a small table on which wedding crowns, the book of Gospels, two wedding rings, a cup of wine, and two white candles have been placed.

The Sacrement of Marriage

BLESSING OF THE RINGS

In the first part of the service, the couple becomes betrothed by the church. The priest blesses the rings and touches the foreheads of the bride and groom with them. Making the sign of the cross above their heads with the rings, he proclaims to each of them, “The servant of God [name] is betrothed to the servant of God [name] in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit.” The rings are put on the right hands, and the official sponsor — koumbáros (male) or koumbára (female) — exchanges the rings three times, symbolizing the complimentary role of husband and wife.

THE CANDLES

The bride and groom each hold a lighted candle during the service, similar to a parable in the Bible where five wise maidens prepare to receive Christ the Bridegroom by lighting their lamps with oil. The candles remind the couple of the light of of Christ who is with them throughout the sacrament and their coming life together.

THE CROWNING

Crowns (stéphana) joined with a ribbon are worn by the bride and groom who are to be respected as king and queen in their home and family. As this crowning takes place, the blessing of God is invoked upon the couple. “O, Lord our God, crown them with honor and glory.” As these words are sung, the koumbáros or koumbára exchange the crowns three times.

THE READINGS

There are two designated readings from the scriptures. In the Epistole of St. Paula to the Ephesians, Paul talks of love and respect. The husband should love his wife and be prepared to give his life to protect her as Christ gave his life out of love for the church. The second reading from the Gospel of St. John relates the story of Christ at the wedding in Cana of Galilee and his miracle of changing water into wine.

THE COMMON CUP

Just as wine was drunk at the wedding in Cana, the bride and groom share a common cup of unconsecrated wine, symbolizing the sharing of all that life will bring — the joys, sorrows, love, and pain.

THE DANCE OF ISAIAH

Led by the priest, the couple circles the small table while wearing their crowns and holding hands. The koumbáros or koumbára follows them, holding the ribbon that joins the crowns. In Greece, guests shower the couple with rose petals and rice during the dance. The bride and groom are proclaimed as husband and wife, at the conclusion of the service. Just before the crowns are removed from their heads, the priest invokes God’s blessings once more. “O Lord, bless these your servants who, by your providence, are now joined in the communion of marriage.”